What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

I do u blow up a house U put dynamite in it

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

what did the iPhone say to the other iPhone. we should not worry about that because iPhones are mute

Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

A: Knock, knock A: Knock, knock A: Um, knock, knock! B: Sorry, I was pretending that I wasn't home.

Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

I wonder what happen to John? Oh John I know what happen to him. What happened to him then? He was playing on the bridge and fell off on accident. Is he okay? Damn women of coarse he is not okay!!!

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...