Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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What did Luigi say to Mario? You look like a fat Mexican

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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How do you make a person cry? Burn his family.

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Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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What ryhmes with turtle rape

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

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A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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