What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

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-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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Hi i love black men so much and i am a jewish faggot bye

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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