So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

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What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

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Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

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You are in a room with hitler and bin Ladin. You have a gun with 1 bullet. Who do shoot? Don't worry you don't have to make that decision. They are already both dead

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::ring::ring::ring:: Hello? Is your refrigerator running? Yes, yes it does! Why? I work for a local home appliance superstore and we are having a special on repairs and maintenance. Would you like to try our home appliance maintenance offer? I'm sorry no! I do not actually have a refrigerator. I only have a cooler. Bye! ::the man shuts off his cell phone and sets it on top of his styro-foam cooler as he mumbles to himself alone while on his boat, "Darn advertisement offers!" and continues to fish in the middle of the lake::

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There are three guys on an airplane, a Korean, a Mexican, and an American. The pilot comes on the speaker and syays,"The plane is to heavy, throw out the thing you have most in your country." The Korean throws out an AK-47 and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The Mexican throws out a taco and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The American throws out the Mexican and says,"We have to many of these in our country."

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What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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