yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops