knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too You read that again to make sure I'm not fucking with you

Why did the cop shoot his 4 year old son? Because the little bitch ate his leftovers

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...