I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

You idiot thats 9 letters

What's the difference between a duck?

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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