Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

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What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

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Face Hunter is scum

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops