Billy: Hey hey hey!!!!! wanna hear a dirty joke? Joe: Sure Billy: A pig fell in the mud

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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i found waldo.

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

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There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

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A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

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What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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