What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

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knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

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An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

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When you nut and slice her fukcing dumb head off fucking dumb BITCH DIES

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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WILLYS

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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