Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

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How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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What did the snoop dog have for breakfast? Weed

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

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What happened to the fat japanese guy? His house was destroyed by the earthquake.

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

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Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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