Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

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"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Penis

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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why did the dad stop working on the roof he fell off

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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