How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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silver bullet?

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

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Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops