There's a elf ,a peice of paper, and a pencil. What happens next? The elf writes on the paper.

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Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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how would you feel when your girlfriend dumps you really bad because she just dumped you man!!!1

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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Q: What are 4 consecutive fart's called? A: Fart's, unless someone gives them names?

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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Queens Park rangers

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What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Some poems don't make sense, Salad.

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An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

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A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

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Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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what do you call your mama at the gas station

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops