How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

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Please ignore this statement.

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Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

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im telling maguire

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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