what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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who do we all like george goodburn

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

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What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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I read the terms of service.

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How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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What's more annoying than reading a joke you can't understand? ?????

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- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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