Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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And Stephen Hawking said.

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What's big and long? My dick.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Adam Chebali is awesome

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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