There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

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Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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drew edminstin is a rat

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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A Christian walks into a bar . . . mitzvah.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops