Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Boxing on Boxing Day

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a snake at a snail convention? A snake at a snail convention.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

thumb_up thumb_down -8

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops