Are you gay. No. Ok.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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