Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense MICROWAVE

Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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