Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

a grasshopper walks into a bar the bartender says hey we have a drink named after you the grasshopper says what dave?

What's worse than finding a worm in the apple you're eating? Many things could be worse than that, from the less severe e.g. Finding half a worm in the apple you're eating to the more severe, such as the total collapse of civilization.

what did jacob say to coach a joke

mental kid

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

catlin: hi Thomas: shut up bich 12 assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssl;

Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

hey i just met you.. and this is crazy. but here my facebook so add me maybe!!

Check this web out www.hurr-durr.com

What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

knock knock whos there make up make up who hahahaha you said make a poo

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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