what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

Why did the guy have one shoe? Because he took one shoe off at a time

What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

What comes after 69? mouthwash

Yo Mama just died.

whats red and all over the road your family after a horrific car crash

why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

mitchell palmer sucks

A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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