Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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You know what's funny about AIDS? Nothing.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

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why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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