What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

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What colour are blackberries? Purple.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

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Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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How did the black man manage to get that 42 inch TV? He had been working a lot of overtime at work to try and treat his wife and kids.

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

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What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops