What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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wanna hear a joke? no

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Q. What red and scratches glass A. a baby in an oven

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here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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Popsicles

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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