What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

don't read this

Julian Ha.

What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

Roes are red Violets are blue I have a potato Let's make pie

What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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