Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

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A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, "do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves. The next day, the same duck walks back into the store, and asks the clerk if they have any grapes. The clerk, slightly annoyed, says no again, and the duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back in and asks again if they have any grapes. The pissed off clerk says, "No, and if you ask again i'm gonna nail your feet to the floor. The duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back into the store, and this time he asks the clerk, "do you have any nails?" The clerk says, "Yes." The Duck leaves.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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A russian, a jew, and a black guy are walking down the street. The midget trips and knocks into the jew who in turn knocks into the black guy. It turns out that they all know each other from high school. They ended up going out for lunch and drinks and it actually turned into a great day.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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A child walks into a classroom.

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

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How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

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Why was 6 scared of me? cause i ate 9

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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