why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

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What did the black person say to the other black person? Im really white, I just want to fell what its like to be black.

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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So a bar walks into a man...

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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who has a vagina, likes men , soundslike afive year old girl, has some sweet boobies and onlyhas one hair on his little vag? Robert sweeny

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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Albert your flies undone.

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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Q: what is an anti-joke? A: Coffee Volvos

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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