how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

thumb_up thumb_down -24

i cant STAND cripple jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

yeyeyeyeye live action

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops