What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

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Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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What's up? Your time.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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XD A COZY FIGHT XD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? I am gonna kick your ass, break your face and then give you a kiss on the cheek as your mangled corpse bleeds out... XD :)) THANKS FOR THE LAUGHTER XD XD Reminds me of a former comment where you describe the local weather, you know, we do not live that far away from each other, hell it was actually the time, we are completely in the same timezone, so anyway, do you also get cartoon network on your television?

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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1: I heard a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. 2: Okay, knock knock! 1: Who's there? 2: ???

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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