A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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Black guy something something. Anti-racist punchline.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

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Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

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This is funny.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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All your facts check out, so I sent a little search team to find someone selling us out, it turns that they are after the leader of "The order" and "The king`s throne", so unless you got some small sub-department going on, point zero is in danger, ill explain everything once this is over.

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Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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My dad

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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