Your sex life.

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

What would Michael Jackson do on the Moon? Nothing. He's dead.

A kid walks into a bar He gets kicked out

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

Q: What does a gay horse eat? A: Cheese

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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