Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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European on my shoes, buddy.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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Why so serious ?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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BIG MAC'S

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Why is 16 scared of 17? Because 17, 18, 19 *crickets*

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Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

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So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops