Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? Steve Johnson, and I'm legally obligated to inform you that I'm a sex offender.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops