I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

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my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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A man punches a 3rd grader in the stomach. Not long after he is arrested and no longer is allowed within 500 feet of a public school.

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This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car and laying on the side of the rode for 2 hours then you find out that your wife was cheating on you with her your own brouther

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

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Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

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Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops