Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

Anyone can post anything.

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

What's funnier than a Laffy Taffy joke? Almost anything.

why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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