ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

who is jacked and looks like a beast? • James Cornish

Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

If you give a mouse a cookie... you're destroying their natural diet.

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

Why did the boy stop working on a farm? His country became more economically developed.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

Who is big and stupid My brother

How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

Phew... it's gone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...