your momma so fat, that she secretly crys every night, because she is so self concious about her weight. and has to talk to a therapist because shes bolemic and has suicidal thoughts, because she cant stand the way she looks

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a straight line? Because he has Parkinson's disease.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus? Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of african decent to sit in towards the front of a bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of european decent.

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a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

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If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

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Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

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Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

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Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

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Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

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Yo mama is so fat, she lost in a race to a person who had less physical mass.

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some water , jill ended up bending over and jack ended up touching a blue waffle

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Whos worse than Akise Teague. Mike Vick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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