A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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404 Error: Joke not found

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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What did the big pickle say to the little pickle? "I'm black."

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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BIG MAC'S

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

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What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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What's funny about anti-humor? Nothing.

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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