Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

When life throws knives at you, run away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...