roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

Robin, get in the car, please.

Roses are Razzmatazz Violets are Arsenic These colors are weird Cancer.

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

Want to hear a joke? Obama

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

I am paralyzed from the neck down.

Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

i'm an inbred jew - Barras

My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

How did the black man cross the Atlantic? An airplane. He also could have used a boat. However, airplanes are a preferred form of travel.

Roses are red.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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