Know what's funny? Not these jokes!

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

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So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

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Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

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What's green, brown, red, and is covered with crumbs in a ditch on the side of the road? A girl-scout who got hit by a car...

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

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Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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