"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

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A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

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My two friends Larry and Paul are both race horses. They were getting ready for a big race to quolify them for the Kentucky durby. BANG! The race started! What. Close race! First it was Larry then Paul then Larry then Paul! And finally Larry came out and won it! Paul went to the winners circle and congratulated Larry. He said "hey great job Larry but next time after you come back from touring will you let me win?" Larry says "oh! Of course this couldn't get between us! We're like two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket. We're best friends"... So when he came back from touring Larry said it was great! And promised let Paul win. BANG the race started! It was Paul then Larry then Paul then Larry won again. Paul was a little mad that he he didn't win but he went to congratulate larry anyway. Larry said next time he was deffinetly going to let Paul win, because he wasn't gonna let this get between them because they are two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket, they are best friends. Then after Larry came back from touring he promised again he would let Paul win. BANG! The race started and it was Paul then Larry! Then Paul! Larry! Paul! Then larry won. Paul at this point furious went to the winners circle. He talked to Larry "Larry why didn't you let me win for the third time!? This is just your ego trying to win every time now!?" I didn't want them to fight so I chimed in "Larry, Paul! Please don't fight! Your two peas in a pod! Closer then bread in a basket! Your best friends!! You don't want to fight like this!" Larry turned to Paul and said "Hey look! A talking dog!"

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

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what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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Why did Alice cross the road? Because she wasn't funny. At all. So the people on the other side of the road asked her to do so.

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why did the chicken cross the rode?????? i dont know because he felt like it???????????p.s.i actually dont know why he crossed the rode so go ask the next who makes a joke about a chicken crossing a rode?

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What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

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What is better than life? Nothing.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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A blind man watches TV

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A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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