a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

What did the dead man say to his best friend? Nothing.

You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

Why is this joke funny It isn't

An anti-joke

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...