vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

What's your blood type? Red.

What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

Who is it?

Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

A russian, a jew, and a black guy are walking down the street. The midget trips and knocks into the jew who in turn knocks into the black guy. It turns out that they all know each other from high school. They ended up going out for lunch and drinks and it actually turned into a great day.

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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