How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

Anti - Jokes. com

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

What do the Mexican man, the Asian man and the Jewish man all have in common? "man"

What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

Whats The difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? One's a dog ones a human. 363\

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

Once, I went to Peru.

2 black kids walk into school

Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

A psychotic man steals a Police Officer's handgun, the man runs down the street. What happened? He fell in a hole and died.

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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