Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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whats my name? Matt

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Why did the little boy fall of his bike? He was dead.

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Pickles

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If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

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Mary had a little lamb Little lamb Mary had a little lamb That Mary wanted to blow Because Mary was into beastiality

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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