Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

Knock knock. Its open.

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

SUCK MY NUTS

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

What has two legs? Half a cat

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

God is like semen. They're both nouns.

Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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