How did the Jewish husband and stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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The government

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Ms Leong Sux

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? It would probably be the court janitor who was responsible for that job, rather than the lawyers.

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Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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I love you! Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Squirrels are rabbid Yes mi this is a haiku!!!! I know ur reading this so grape grape grape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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